3 Ways To Connect With Students

In this podcast episode, SEL Educator Brad Davis and I (Mister Brown) will share three practical tips for connecting with students in the classroom and other settings.

Class Meetings

[1:25] One strategy for connecting with students is what Brad calls class meetings. Start the beginning of the school day with a topic discussion. It can be as simple as what’s your favorite color or where do you want to go for vacation. Class meetings build a classroom culture of communication in just 10 - 15 minutes a day.

Daily class meetings create an opportunity for kids to get to talk. Students feel valued when they have a chance to talk about themselves or share what's on their minds. It’s also a great way to teach students how to listen and how to engage in conversation. 

The class meeting really showcases its value later in the school year. When something heavy occurs, an educator who has been doing class meetings has a safe place for students to talk. If there has been bullying at school or a serious event that affects students, they now have a place they know they can ask questions and be heard. 

When Connecting Counts

[3:45] Brad shares a story from one of his class meetings. One student didn’t want to share about her summer vacation at first. She finally revealed that her grandmother had passed away right before school started. Another boy shared that his grandfather had died recently and Brad got to share that his grandmother had also died. This girl went from feeling shut down to relief in having shared what was bothering her.

Sharing personal stories creates a connection between the educator and the students. It also creates a connection between the students. Students learn to empathize with others. Hearing different perspectives and life experiences helps students to appreciate and respect others. It also helps them to be grateful for what they have.

Getting Perspective

[7:28] Class meetings give educators a chance to better understand their students and their perspectives. No matter what question is asked, tuning into the answers that students give can help an educator better understand where their students are coming from. How a student answers a question can be very telling about their state of mind or background.

When educators share their own stories and perspectives, they demonstrate to their students that they are people before they are educators. Students forget that educators are people with personal lives. There can be many ways to connect and relate with each other when students know more about the educators in their lives.

Got a hobby or specialty? Do special things with your family? Educators should show their students what they are interested in and how they spend their time outside of school. Not only does it give students a different perspective about their educators, it gives educators a chance to teach students about something new. 

Modelling

[16:10] Educators are inherent role models to their students, so another great way to connect with students is modelling. This includes modelling the kinds of attitudes and behaviors educators want to see in their students. When educators are positive role models, modelling lifts up their students to want to be the best version of themselves. 

Being a positive role model isn’t about presenting a perfect front. Everyone makes mistakes. Modelling for an educator means turning mistakes into learning opportunities. What kid doesn’t like to point out an adult’s shortcomings? Educators don’t need to hide from the mistakes they make. Model how to respond to mistakes and grow from them.

They Are Always Watching

[17:35] Another aspect of modelling is remembering that students are always watching. Again, this isn’t about being perfect. Knowing that students are always watching gives educators an opportunity to practice what they teach. Educators can model how to deal with stress, how to respond when someone is disrespectful, and so much more. 

One thing that I [Mister Brown] like to model in front of my own kids is what I call “consider others.” My kids are so used to me saying “consider others” that they sometimes roll their eyes when they hear it (like in this Conversations With the Browns podcast). To consider others is to put others before yourself. 

I feel so strongly that it’s important to consider others. It’s important for students to see that the world is not only about them. So, I don’t mind that my kids are always watching, especially when they see me helping a stranger in need or responding calmly to a serious situation. 

Don’t Underestimate This

[21:00] We should never underestimate the power of modelling. For good or bad, educators are always modelling. Whatever desired outcome an educator wants, the educator must be able to model it authentically. If an educator is not authentic or is modelling poor behavior, their students will pick up on it.

Through his SEL Master’s program, Brad learned that the number one strategy for connecting with students is modelling. Innately, students can feel how educators are acting. It doesn’t do educators any good to fake how they are feeling. Students can tell when someone is not being authentic. 

It’s Never Too Late

[22:35] If modelling has not been a part of your school or classroom culture, it’s not too late to start. Even if being a role model seems daunting, it starts with something as small as a few minutes for a class meeting. It involves being authentic in who you are and being willing to make changes to the way you have been doing things. Connecting with students through modelling is a powerful way to make an impact in the lives of students. It has the added benefit of growing us as educators into better people. 

I would love to know how you feel about being a role model to students. Have you found ways to connect with students that you can share? Has being an educator helped you to grow in your personal life? Tell me about it.